Another modest proposal
It’s been a while since we’ve added a new state to the union (Hawaii in August, 1959). Lately I’ve begun to think that maybe we should start thinking about the political process of adding Iraq as our 51st state. Let me plainly state my case:
1. It would solve the “pesky” and on-going problem of the Iraqi’s having to set up their own government.
Our military leaders tell us that Iraq suffers from *political* issues, and not necessarily military ones, which is why we have to stay there “for the forseeable future” (Which I think we can loosely translate to 50-60 years, like Germany and Japan, places we still maintain a military presence after WWII). Well, we can fix this problem: our constitution has worked well for us for over 200 years, so no need for the Iraqi’s to continue to try to start from scratch.
2. It’d be a heck of a solution to our current oil woes.
Instead of us continuing to pour money into Iraq (that we’ve stolen-borrowed from our children and our children’s children without asking, I might add) without reward, we could now monetize our investment for our children. It would be like adding Alaska to the union (with its huge oil reserves), only in one of the most geopolitically sensitive areas of the globe. As I said, we’re going to “be there” for a generation anyway!
3. Having $1.00/gallon gas in the U.S. for at least a generation would sure silence the anti-war crowd.
I don’t think this requires any explanation. Oh, and don’t forget to “short” the oil company stocks…
4. Our enemies would be forced to stop accusing us of being “imperialist”.
Sure this proposal would peeve the Islamic extremist jihadists, so I say let the Iraqi’s vote on it. And no rigged elections this time: if they honestly want us to leave, we should. If they want to be Americans, they should be allowed to be Americans. And this gift keeps on giving- a “free” Iraq as a state of the United States would be Syria’s and Iran’s worst nightmare. Not to mention China, who competes with us for every barrel of oil available to support their burgeoning industrial economy.
May 31st, 2008 at 22:55
I believe that we should take over the world and make all countries our states.
We should put a MARINE with a machine gun as the “MARINE-IN-CHARGE” by all the current and future “Governors” We should shoot them as soon as they stop agreeing with us and place the “Lt. Governor” as the new Governor (but make sure there is a new “Lt. Governor” ready before we shoot him/her.)
I think we know what is best for all citizens of this world and our way of life is the best around (just because we know this and don’t have to prove anything to anyone with any funny head gear).
I think all policies and procedures should be governed by that “Marine-In-Charge” His decision should be “FINAL”. If anything happens to our MARINE than we should nuke the region “that state” is in and start over again.